Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

[AlaskaDenise]

Tahiti, South Pacific (IP) - Our investigative reporter has just been informed that animals will no longer warn humans of impending disasters.

Many animals let humans know when the great tsunami hit the Pacific Island a couple of years ago. The same has been true going back in time and now the animals say they are sick and tired of being treated like animals and will sneak off quietly before future catastrophes occur.

One elephant, who wants to have his identity remain secret, says he will never forget how he and his friends threw a fit before the great tsunami and all he got for his trouble was a lashing at the hands of his handlers. Never again he says.

A wealthy dog named Duke living in San Francisco has become appalled at the way his gerbil friends are being treated there. The dog, who has appeared in bean commercials and is clearly capable of human speech, says he has no trouble hearing rocks and subduction plates grinding below the Earth's surface and says he would go down with the ship before he utters one word of warning to anyone.

Birds everywhere have felt betrayed and besmirched by the recent pack of lies aimed at them by folks who accused them of carrying and spreading avian flu. Let he among you who is without sin toss the first stone - indignantly proclaimed the Bird of Paradise. His friend quickly whispered into his ear and the B.O.P. said, "Oh, ah, never mind... please scratch that last statement off your notepad...". He continued by openly saying that before the next disaster that he and his friends will fly off at night.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s3i23106#this

 

[prepdeb]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

Love it :applause: :applause: :applause:

Thanks for posting it

 

[Niko]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

Too funny!

Thanks AD!:tiphat:

 

[Laidback Al]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

. . . Birds everywhere have felt betrayed and besmirched by the recent pack of lies aimed at them by folks who accused them of carrying and spreading avian flu. . . .

A bar-headed goose, speaking on condition of anonymity, stated "Dead birds don't fly. Our kind is not the source of Clade 2.2" It flapped it wings and waved its hands and said "It is all just propaganda".

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[AlaskaDenise]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

Who are we to doubt the word of a goose that can fly at record-holding 30,000 feet. Anyone who can keep a clear head at those altitudes without oxygen must have a superior brain.

.

 

[sharon sanders]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

:applause:

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

:applause:

ANIMALS ARE STILL ARE FREINDS ,ONE CAME TO ME YESTERDAY WITH A MESSAGE,

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

ANIMALS ARE STILL ARE FREINDS ,ONE CAME TO ME YESTERDAY WITH A MESSAGE,

oh by the way it was a crow what do they know snowy

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

oh by the way it was a crow what do they know snowy

just to keep you updated snowy another crow has visited me

 

[AlaskaDenise]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

I always pay attention to Ravens.

Their warnings should be heeded.
(except when they're being tricksters)

.

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

I always pay attention to Ravens.

Their warnings should be heeded.
(except when they're being tricksters)

.

thanks for that Denise:applause: i will do my home work

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

thanks for that Denise:applause: i will do my home work

thought a little about this thread and feel alot of dought.i was brought up as a roman catholic and learnt to love my neighbour,studied budhism and got the same message in the diamond sutra,sorry have not had time to study all religions but they most likely have the same message at heart.my point being i am aware of the folly of self deception and acultist ideas by cleaver minds. so i stand by loving my neighbour who ever he may be or what he has done.please do not reply to this post.florida feel free to remove if not inkeeping .

 

[Jonesie]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

This thread brings to mind a conversation I overheard between 2 cats a few months back. They were disgruntled over the fact that they worked in such paltry conditions. They were thrown out of the house every evening to go hunt mice all night long. No food or water was provided them for the 12 hours spent out of doors. No shelter either from the cold, storms, excessive heat, snow and rain. They thought of themselves as slaves.

They were seperated from their parents and siblings at a very young age, placed in a cage in a pet shop and sold to their new owners. As kittens, they were considered cute and cuddly and were treated and fed well, but were expected to entertain the entire family all day long. As they grew older, a collar was placed around their neck with an ID tag depicting the address they were to be returned to should they attempt any escape.

As they approached adulthood their food rations were curtailed to just dry tasteless food, with just an occasional can of cat food and a bowl of milk for variety. When their water bowls went dry, which was quite often, they were forced to drink from puddles and toilets.

How does one maintain their personal dignity under these appalling conditions?
They both wished to leave this life of servitude, but had nowhere to go.

But they considered their plite to be somewhat better than the dogs in the neighborhood. Many of the dogs were chained to posts and doghouses, and forced to live surrounded by their own body wastes, which sometimes were not removed for weeks at a time.

So I can well understand the frustration these animals feel. Under similar slave-like conditions, I would not care to warn the humans either.

But my cats are treated like the gods. They are very finicky eaters and have at least 4 bowls of differing foods, milk, and other kitty treats from which to choose daily. And they have bowls of ice water and room temperature water. And they still want me to open a 5th can of food just in case it might taste a bit better. And they find the softest pillows in the house on which to catnap all day and night. They go in and out...in and out..all day and night at their pleasure. They make no attempts to escape. They are happy and content.
But warn me of any danger? I don't think so. They are just too interested in satisfying all their own desires.

I am beginning to think they are the owners, and I am the slave.

"In ancient Egypt, cats were worshiped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten that!"

Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously.
- - - Dr Louis J. Camuti - - -​

 

[deadandalive]

Re: Animals Will No Longer Warn Humans of Impending Disasters

This thread brings to mind a conversation I overheard between 2 cats a few months back. They were disgruntled over the fact that they worked in such paltry conditions. They were thrown out of the house every evening to go hunt mice all night long. No food or water was provided them for the 12 hours spent out of doors. No shelter either from the cold, storms, excessive heat, snow and rain. They thought of themselves as slaves.

They were seperated from their parents and siblings at a very young age, placed in a cage in a pet shop and sold to their new owners. As kittens, they were considered cute and cuddly and were treated and fed well, but were expected to entertain the entire family all day long. As they grew older, a collar was placed around their neck with an ID tag depicting the address they were to be returned to should they attempt any escape.

As they approached adulthood their food rations were curtailed to just dry tasteless food, with just an occasional can of cat food and a bowl of milk for variety. When their water bowls went dry, which was quite often, they were forced to drink from puddles and toilets.

How does one maintain their personal dignity under these appalling conditions?
They both wished to leave this life of servitude, but had nowhere to go.

But they considered their plite to be somewhat better than the dogs in the neighborhood. Many of the dogs were chained to posts and doghouses, and forced to live surrounded by their own body wastes, which sometimes were not removed for weeks at a time.

So I can well understand the frustration these animals feel. Under similar slave-like conditions, I would not care to warn the humans either.

But my cats are treated like the gods. They are very finicky eaters and have at least 4 bowls of differing foods, milk, and other kitty treats from which to choose daily. And they have bowls of ice water and room temperature water. And they still want me to open a 5th can of food just in case it might taste a bit better. And they find the softest pillows in the house on which to catnap all day and night. They go in and out...in and out..all day and night at their pleasure. They make no attempts to escape. They are happy and content.
But warn me of any danger? I don't think so. They are just too interested in satisfying all their own desires.

I am beginning to think they are the owners, and I am the slave.

"In ancient Egypt, cats were worshiped as gods.
Cats have never forgotten that!"

Most cats, when they are Out want to be In, and vice versa, and often simultaneously.
- - - Dr Louis J. Camuti - - -​

meeoow better scarper before they catch me at the keyboard!